A chain of events have recently been linked together to prepare me for the next chapter of my life’s story. I’ve been hitting curveballs, fastballs and sliders right in succession. I’ve faced all of them, standing on my own two feet with courage and determination. It’s easy to be coerced down the wrong path. Deception lurks around every corner when you’re living your dream. People are going to want to knock you down out of jealousy or just because they don’t understand. Maybe they’re not meant to understand right now but if I just stay the course, stick to the plan, eventually they will see what I’ve been up to. There’s so much involved. There’s so many pieces to the puzzle that makes up my life. Unless you’re in my inner circle or were instrumental in developing my plan to success, it’s impossible to know the entire story. Ultimately, everybody has to pick their own course to take toward freedom. Nobody can do that for you but there are guidelines that can be suggested. It all comes down to growing everyday in mind, body and spirit. Spirit has to come first. If you can just figure out a way to connect spiritually, the mind and body will follow. It’s a personal discovery and conception for each individual. For me, I go to the beach a lot and I let my worries, concerns, relationships and decisions get taken out to sea. My creator has given me the ability to see what I need to let go of and what’s not in my capacity to fix. True believers in whatever spiritual concept they have will be able to see these things too. In order to keep moving forward another necessity is giving away what has been freely given to me. So keep reaching out. Keep learning and growing then share it with other people like I’m doing right now. Hopefully this blog will help people who might feel lost at the moment, find a way out from the bondage of uncertainty. Trust the process. Stick to the plan and take action when it’s an absolute no brainer. If you’re into reading check out “The Four Hour Work Week” by Tim Ferris for some inspiration.
For those of you that don't understand pain and suffering or struggle, I strongly suggest you stop reading now. Have you ever woken up just to close your eyes again? Stayed in your room for days or weeks at a time with only the energy to walk to the bathroom? It's a crippling feeling of helplessness that can only be understood by someone that's been through it. I had to forget about myself completely because if it were entirely up to me and I had no one, I wouldn't be alive right now. But I looked at my husband and thought about our future children. On a daily basis I remind myself. Suicide doesn't take the pain away, it only passes it on to those you leave behind. -Brennan Marie
Today, the present moment, is the gift. It’s one of many gifts we receive when we seek guidance. There’s the inner gift of recognizing who I am and what I’m meant to be doing. It gets overwhelming and sometimes I can’t handle accepting the gifts. I can get ungrateful for the gift and that’s when I start going astray. I have to been thankful everyday for every breath, for every interaction with interesting people who have been put in my life for a divine reason. Guidance. I don’t always know what’s best for me. Then I’ll hear someone say the exact thing I need to hear and then I can take action. Putting good character building into practice is no easy task but it’s liberating. I suffer from panic disorder, alcoholism, bipolar disorder, manic and major depressive disorder; but it’s all manageable with the help of a team of the right professionals. I have to have mentors of all types to help manage my life. I can’t do it alone. Finances, career decisions, relationships, family issues; I always need to be talking to someone who has valid experience in each area to help fix my flaws. I focus on my strengths and work harder to draw them out and my weaknesses, well I leave them with people better equipped to handle them. It’s really little things they tell me to do and it becomes a quick fix. I don’t have to let little things or issues build up to the point where now it’s a giant monster in front of me. Acting with a rapid determination to be better and a clear belief in an ultimate, forgiving and loving Creator, always produces the best results. I can’t control the weather therefore I am not a Higher Power. But I do have the power to accept change and to have the willingness to do the next right thing. Hope this helps somebody
Coincidences don’t really exist. In my life, when something occurs right on time, it’s really the universe telling me that I’m ready to level up in a small or big way. I’ve been writing and singing since 8 years old and I’ve been willing to go to any length to achieve my goal of being a great and recognized artist. Recently, opportunities and realizations have been coming at lightning speeds. I’ve had to swallow truths about myself and practice humility which is a sign of preparation. I’ve had to accept compliments and criticisms as a way towards growth and achievement. The gift is to be present on a daily basis. Maintaining a routine required for success is no easy task but it’s easier than fighting against what I am born to be. Stuffing or ignoring my true calling is to deny the Higher Power the right to shape me into what it needs me to be. Staying strong and staying on the right path is not always the popular decision to make and temptations want me to give in to the norm or old behaviors. Well I’m in the business of progress and change. Huge developments have unfolded as a direct result of following the signs and trusting in the process.
I’m not that important. It’s not that I’m not important, everybody is important to the stream of life, but when I become more important than everybody else and stop caring about how other people feel; I’m headed for trouble. Sure there are things that I’m great at and there are days when I feel like I’m invincible but even then, I’m just another human being doing my very best to just be. Sometimes I’m not ok with just being. It’s hard to forget about my little plans and designs when a lot of the time that’s all I’m focused on. Just being me has to be ok though, it’s good enough. It’s like I want to be a 10, I feel sometimes like a 2 and really we are all just 5’s. Another grain of sand on the beach.